Dramatic behavior is a negative branch from the tree of “Emotion”. As written earlier, emotion is and of itself meant to be attended to. If the base emotional need is not met, further measures are sometimes administered. Take an interaction I had with a former female friend: (An acquaintance: no intimate encounters and a few light advances I made were swiftly rejected prior.)
Female: “I don’t know Sean; I want to get fucked. I don’t know why it is so difficult to find someone…”
Me: “Well if you wanted to have sex, why not look for someone strictly for that?”
Female: “I know I can go to a bar and do that. I want to find someone who will make love to me, and we’ll fuck…”
I am paraphrasing of course, but this was presented to me several times when we would hang out. She sounded extremely nervous and uncomfortable making these proclamations to me, which is the opposite vibe from any preface to an amorous encounter. As a problem solver, I suggested she stopped looking for her “superman” and mingle with a regular guy if she needed “it” so badly.
The expletive “fuck” indeed came out of her mouth in describing the act, furthering the “tease factor” of the situation. If a lesser male were in my place, the reaction to such language would lead onto a blatant pass on the female. This would be the proper reaction given the dramatic scene I had witnessed.
In closing, dramatic actions and speech can make you a pawn in an emotional chess game.
To synchronize with another human means to coexist wholly. The goal is to push growth for the future. A popular rift in this balance is the extremes of males and females. On the female side: Emotion. On the male: Physical. When both are abused, a negative effect is probable.
For this writing, I wish to focus on the emotional side of a female. I will preface this by saying I am no expert in the field. It is based on my studies in deducing problems I have faced in the past.
Raw emotion from a female is meant to be acknowledged. I passively let it fall by the wayside without allowing it to affect me; much to her dismay. I wished to be told there was a problem instead of answering her emotional signals. I felt I deserved a logical explanation. Unfortunately, it ended poorly because I was not offended by her outbursts. “Did I deserve all that prodding?” I wondered. Emphatically: NO.
I am more of an observer who would rather speak through action, rather than meander through petty arguments. These arguments will eventually snowball into public scenes of disrespect and whatever else. I feel as though it is not my duty to be the father preaching from the book of common sense. Instead, I smile and laugh. At least I have the power to move someone…
“Physical eye” refers to a personality type I have chronicled pertaining certain males and rare females. The lifeblood of their existence gravitates towards physical beauty. When the calendar pages turn, their interest wanes into eventual disdain formulates. They will have no problem in starting anew, due to adeptness in emotionally disconnecting themselves. People who tend to cheat normally branch out from this.
On the negative hand, beauty can intoxicate to the point of irrationality. This occurs quite frequently when meeting new people. The physical eye keeps his (for the sake of the males being the average here) area of operation quite vast. The prey is labeled as options for a possibility of future entanglements. The areas to work from can be quite numerous, such as:
His Work
His College
His Significant Other’s social network (Family may be included)
Like lower species, the physical eye will wither to nothingness once age becomes a factor.
There is no greater hindrance in life than petty social drama. I did not find this to be a trap until I was entrenched in it. I was wronged a few times and I wanted logical explanations. As I pried deeper to understand, I was met with a skewed list of events that didn’t match my recollections. I knew then to cease communications with the other person.
But after months of contemplation, I realized I put too much thought into the aftermath. Reconnecting was never an option. My main objective was to put an end to a chapter in my history. “Why must it be a chapter?” I thought. Considering how things turned out; it isn’t worth a footnote of mention.
One of the unspoken “gifts” of a relationship is the unknown future ahead. There will be decisions to be made, arguments to be had, sailing on a sea of random events. Some humans are well equipped to steer in the right direction, thus making the bond stronger. But most fall into the category of “automaton”. Instead of relying on honesty, they would rather answer in a stereotypical way so as not to arouse any suspicion of their true beliefs on any given situation.
Their alternative is to bring up the topics you have discussed intimately to their friends or co-workers, because they are pining away to compare shitty lives. “So-and-so said this to me last night.” This is not favorable since it is out of context. Immediately, the person hearing the story will side with the storyteller because that is common courtesy.
On the other side, you have the “so-and-so” being talked about who is unaware. In fact, the person is oblivious there was a problem in the relationship to begin with. The automaton answered in the way her/she heard from their parents or any outside influence. It is merely repeating the words in a robotic drone. Honesty is their Achilles heel.
I have never been under a microscope more than when I was in a relationship or attempting to start one. Did I have a few qualities that needed refinement? Yes. Did my behavior warrant such scrutiny? No. Here is a brief list of some complaints I have received:
“This music makes me angry. Can you change it?”
Keep in mind this was asked in my vehicle. A minute request like this is the first step in losing your individuality. Eventually, all of my differences were laid out before me. She got her way a lot in life, obviously…
“You should talk more. Being quiet is disrespectful.”
I am naturally shy, so I guess this can be taken the wrong way. Regardless of that assessment, forcing the issue on someone’s personality traits/flaws is never the answer unless you enjoy some uncomfortable conversation.
“You’re a know-it-all, OK?!”
I received that after the woman asked me for an opinion about her convoluted life. When friends tell me their problems, I tend to hyper-focus on their situation and try to lead them to the best result using my misanthropic philosophy. I put myself in their shoes before I finalize my solutions. It is something I have always enjoyed doing. It is now that I have realized how much effort I put into such minutia. I wonder why that one is still alone.
Back then, my motivations were similar to any other man in this world: I hoped to gain favor for a possible intimate encounter. It was never worth it. I put my music back on.
I have given myself the title of Grand Inquisitor. Questioning all things is a necessity in understanding the innards of human logic. In terms of study, I would rather sit and observe the mechanics behind certain interactions than participating myself. My shy nature feeds into this.
But as I grow older, the only way to compare averages is for me to enable the exchanges. With certain people, prying is nothing short of asking one introductory question. A person who loves the sound of their voice will inundate you with non sequiturs. Their eyes may dart around the room if you attempt to get a word in edge wise. The only way to combat this would be to completely go about your business. Do something productive! Chime in with a few I guarantee the person would not even know the difference as they’ll continue to talk your ear off. There is no point in making eye contact because they will repeat this routine to someone else briefly after your bombardment.
The reason for the constant banter has to do with their experiences in life. Without a high self awareness, this habit will continue for the entirety of their existence.
Here is a fun exercise for everyone:
1. Go to your favorite social networking site.
2. Take a gander at some of your friends’ pictures.
3. Count how many pictures with any alcoholic beverages.
Regardless of your results, the point I am making is that alcohol remains king. Alcohol can add a layer of personality that is otherwise dormant in the sober state. It can also open a floodgate of emotion in any one direction, be it positive or negative. All of these side effects are well known throughout society, yet people continue to practice irresponsibly.
Alcohol has played me for a fool several times. The feeling of warmth is indescribable, but it was never a lasting effect. Impulsive as I was, alcohol taught me to always question so-called “genuine” statements if it is accompanied by noxious breath. All words come to naught.
On the topic of relationships, one must visualize a heavy blanket. Something that can keep you warm, fuzzy for a spell. The necessity for the blanket comes and goes depending on the season, or mood. Over the course of many seasons, that same blanket may not have the alluring appeal it once did. Old, lack of thought or buried in complacency, faded coloring throughout. The threading is worn, unable to cultivate your imagination as it once did.
Or do you look at this dated fabric and immediately feel the warmth it has constantly given you? The hairline rips are the tiny memories of years past. Good, bad or indifferent. As a whole, such a fabric cannot be rethreaded.
The difference between the two perceptions is that the latter takes deeper insight. Most humans are not capable of this.
All assholes in life have someone who tolerates their miserable existence. It is a harsh truth everyone must deal with. These types aren’t exactly serial killers and merely notches above pedophiles. The obvious solution would be to verbally reprimand them, yet that will so nothing but stimulate. After all, generating negative reaction is their modus operandi.
Pure ignorance to their being is the only way to impede them. It takes excellent skill to avert your eyes and ears from a vile calamity such as this.
